Calamity Song by The Decemberists (Ups to Dr. GSL on the recco)
“But if Hal had a Luger pointed at him and were under compulsion to try, he’d probably start by explaning that each of the 400 dead tennis balls in the game’s global arsenal represents a 5-megaton thermonuclear warhead. Of the total number of a given days players, three compose a theoretical Anschluss (political union) designated AMNAT, another three SOVWAR, one or two REDCHI, another one or two the wacko but always pesky LIBSYR or more formidable IRLIBSYR and that the day’s remaing players, depending on involved random considerations, can form anything from SOUTHAF to INKPAK to like an independant cell of Nuck insuregents with a 50-click Howitzer and big ideas. Each team is called a combatant.”
“In the game, Combatants 5-megaton warheads can be launched only with handheld tennis racquets. Hence the requirement of actual physical targeting-skill that separates Eschaton from rotisserie-league holocaust games played with protractors and PCs around kitchen tables. The paraboloid transcontinental flight of a liquid-fuel strategic delivery vehicle closely resembles a top-spin lob.”
“Nobody’s using tennis balls now anymore. Josh Gopnik punches LaMont Chu in the stomach and LaMont Chu yells that he’s been punched in the stomach. Ann Kiettenplan had Kieran Mckenna in a headlock and is punching him repeatedly on the top of the skull. Otis P. Lord lets down the beach umbrella and starts pushing his crazy-wheeled food cart diskette-rattling clip toward 12’s open south gate, still flicking furiously at the red beanie’s propeller.”
–Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace.